Made it today

I made it through today, on 0 cals. Two cups of green tea and 5 cups of water today. I was a bit stressed out over my ex yet again. I regret telling him I wanted to get back together. It's too painful to be turned down. He still wants to stay apart. I feel like a fool for asking, and for letting my self feel hurt over it. I was cutting again today too, which is weird cause I did it without thinking. I haven't been cutting as much as before.

I was 91 this morning, but now I'm 90lbs. I wanted to be 89 but it was a no go. Maybe I'll be in the morning...haha fat chance. Tomorrow is also a Halloween party with free food, ugh. I don't know how I'll pull this one off. I really want to fast until Halloween, I want to be 85lbs so bad it hurts. Well of course it hurts. Everything hurts right about now.

I know I'm losing weight and all, but I still feel fat. More so than that I feel bloated at the moment. I got my 100 crunches in a little while ago, plus 50 cross crunches. That makes 200 crunches and 100 cross crunches for the day. It never feels like enough, if it were enough I'd be 89lbs right now lol. Maybe its water weight I don't know. It better go away soon. Its making me more depressed than I am normally.

I'm trying to get my Halloween costume tomorrow and Friday, I'll put pics up if I can.